The Sensuality Deception, Stabilizing Hormonal Agents and the Cranium

As I had my early morning coffee, the "Dear Abby" column captured my eye. A reader composed in with a dating problem and ended her letter with that often-heard stereotype that "Women use sex to get love, and men use love to obtain sex." This is a fantastic summation of the "Sex Trap."

The Sex Trap resembles the Love Trap, where singles analyze good sex as love. Those who fall into the Sex Trap go even farther due to the fact that for these songs, having sex carries enormous meaning and repercussions.

Singles fall under the Sex Trap in one (or both) of 2 ways:

A.they think sex is a needed test of compatibility, (if the sex readies then the relationship will ready too).

B.more frequently, all awareness goes out the window, and one or both formerly level-headed songs consider themselves a committed couple as quickly as they have sex.
So, instead of looking at whether this other person may be a match on levels other than physical attraction-- such as long-lasting requirements, requirements, and desires-- they are blind-sided by the chemistry under the covers.

No doubt, it can be challenging to correspond with truth when all those hormonal agents are running wild. Our body reacts to somebody we are attracted to by producing hormones such as PEA or phenylethylamine (natural amphetamine), dopamine and norepinephrine (natural state of mind enhancers), and testosterone ( boosts libido), that makes the chance to make love with somebody we are drawn in to exceptionally difficult to withstand. After orgasm, we produce oxytocin (which acts on the hypothalamus to produce feelings), which makes us feel really close to and bonded with our sex partner.

These chemical reactions are involuntary and strong , causing powerful feelings of attraction, excitement, well-being, love, and nearness .

But when problems develop, those who fall under the Sex Trap frequently rationalize by believing, "Well, we've got issues, however the sex is fantastic!" They probably wouldn't confess, however they prioritize physical intimacy and regard the rest as optional. Their primary scouting tools are sexual destination and physical compatibility.

Barry North, an RCI coach who works primarily with gay guys, states that a lot of his customers have actually fallen into the Sex Trap.

" For gay men especially in city areas, sex is readily available, which in itself is a trap," North states. "In addition, the culture, with its emphasis on physical appearance, encourages sexual activity. If a prospective partner is going to be sexually compatible, many gay guys desire to find out from the beginning. Why waste your time if the sex isn't going to be excellent?".

North adds, "I presume this is a 'guy' thing rather than a 'gay' thing.".
I do wish to point out that chemistry is necessary. Chemistry is a provided that we cannot manage in a relationship; it is either there or not there, and Full Article it must be there for the collaboration to work. If not there, we can't "make" chemistry take place, though in some cases it can grow in time.

When the hormone-induced intoxication uses off and reality hits, Singles who pursue a relationship based upon sexual chemistry danger relationship failure.

To avoid the Sex Trap, you need to stabilize your heart (and hormonal agents) with your head. This indicates integrating chemistry with he said common sense. While good sex is essential for a sustainable relationship, you need to make your partner options by paying full attention to your vision, objectives, requirements, and values -- while feeling all those interesting triggers!

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